2022 BMW Alpina B8 Gran Coupe a Late Spring Arrival

Jason R. Sakurai
by Jason R. Sakurai

Alpina is to BMW enthusiasts much like AMG is to Mercedes devotees, both eliciting great excitement and emotion. The former has announced the arrival of the 2022 BMW Alpina B8 Gran Coupe in late spring.

Recognized as an independent auto manufacturer by the German Ministry of Transport, Alpina Automobiles has had a longstanding technical partnership with BMW AG, operating as a privately-owned, wholly-separate research and development arm since 1965. The collaboration is such that Alpina vehicles, including the Alpina B7 Sedan, XB7 Sports Activity Vehicle, and now the B8 Gran Coupe, are sold and serviced by BMW dealers here and in Canada. Moreover, Alpinas are covered by the BMW New Vehicle Limited Warranty, and its vehicle maintenance programs, so they’re definitely a part of the family.

Now that we’ve sorted out the warranty and vehicle maintenance on the Alpina B8, let’s get to the part where we discuss what you get for your $139,900 base, plus the $995 destination charge. There’s a 612-horsepower, 4.4-liter bi-turbo V8, with 590 lb-ft of torque under your command. The Alpina will do 0-60 in 3.3 seconds, and a 1/4 mile in 11.5 seconds, with a 201 MPH maximum.

Two twin-scroll turbos are there to convert exhaust-gas energy into boost pressure almost instantly. What is either impressive on the Alpina B8 or lacking on the M850i xDrive from which it is derived is the triple external coolant coolers, larger transmission oil cooler, and Alpina’s intercoolers with 50-percent more cooling system. Which is it, overkill on the Alpina B8, or a need greater than what the M850i requires?

It’s a tough job, but someone has to do it. Hundreds if not thousands of test miles on the most demanding tracks across Europe were necessary to dial in the B8’s sport suspension system. Eibach springs and reinforced sway bars add vehicle stability and ride comfort while balancing the suspension characteristics. The ZF active kinematics control system prevents the rear wheels from pivoting more than 2.3 degrees left or right, before picking up the direction of the front wheels at speed for greater directional stability. The all-wheel driver BMW xDrive system is there to effortlessly transmit power to the road, just as the limited-slip rear differential adds steadiness on approach, and quicker throttle response when exiting.

Shod with 245/35Zr21 ultra-high performance (UHP) tires upfront and 285/35Z21 in back, mounted to Alpina’s classic 20-spoke 21-inch design, Alpina even offers a 20-inch wheel for winter or all-season use, sans the wheel hub covers. Big, blue Brembo four-piston brake calipers with white Alpina lettering, are matched with 15.6-inch brake discs in the front, and 15.7-inch rears for exceptional stops. As fast as the Alpina B8 will run, you’re going to need to stop sometime, and maybe in a hurry at that.

Blue and green metallic finishes are reserved solely for Alpina BMW automobiles, although there are other BMW and BMW Individual colors you can choose from. I’d go through the options if it wasn’t for the fact that the list is almost as long as what’s already included. A carbon roof, Bowers & Wilkins sound system in place of the standard Harman Kardon tuner, six different interior trims, an Alcantara headliner, a driving assistance package, and an even more robust driving assistance pro package rounds out what all is available. Maybe the BMW Alpina B8 Gran Coupe is beyond ultimate amongst ultimate driving machines.

[Images: BMW]

Jason R. Sakurai
Jason R. Sakurai

With a father who owned a dealership, I literally grew up in the business. After college, I worked for GM, Nissan and Mazda, writing articles for automotive enthusiast magazines as a side gig. I discovered you could make a living selling ad space at Four Wheeler magazine, before I moved on to selling TV for the National Hot Rod Association. After that, I started Roadhouse, a marketing, advertising and PR firm dedicated to the automotive, outdoor/apparel, and entertainment industries. Through the years, I continued writing, shooting, and editing. It keep things interesting.

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  • Stuki Stuki on Mar 30, 2021

    "Alpina is to BMW enthusiasts much like AMG is to Mercedes devotees" And "Grand Coupes" are to enthusiasts, what flat tires are.

  • FalconRTV FalconRTV on Mar 30, 2021

    No longer possible to take BMW cars seriously. Engine bays filled with difficult to reach plastic components. Designed for smooth European roads and to be recycled sooner than you think.

  • Peeryog Everytime I see one I am reminded of the current Santa Fe. And vice versa.
  • Original Guy I watched that Moscow parade thing. (With the Cyrillic captions because my Russian is a little rough.) I won't give the whole thing away, but it started off with a couple of dudes riding around in stupid useless convertibles, standing up like Hitler, who I'm pretty sure was an actual Nazi. They drove around in circles and kept stopping to ask if anyone had seen all the missing military equipment, and all the guys kept moaning back, that no, they hadn't, ask the next section of guys.They looked around for someone shorter and sicker-looking than Putin but they were unsuccessful so they let him speak.The North Korean military was there, I guess the invasion has begun. The North Korean guys were skinny but their rifles were nicely polished, I guess they have plenty of time on their hands between meals.Some of the Russian military guys carried little white flags, I assume they keep those handy in case they run across any U.S. Marines.
  • Marc J Rauch EBFlexing on ur mom - Ethanol is compatible with more types of rubber, plastic, and metal than gasoline and aromatics. This means that ethanol is less corrosive. The bottom line is that long before ethanol could have any damaging effect on any engine component, gasoline and aromatics would have already damaged the components. And the addition of ethanol doesn't exacerbate the problems caused by gasoline and aromatics; it actually helps mitigate them.
  • Original Guy Today I learned that a reverse brake bleeder (and a long borescope) can be helpful if you are autistic and don't have any friends and no one wants to work with you to bleed your brakes. Also it is quick, once you figure out the process.When Canada assembled my truck back in circa 1995, they apparently used a different clip to attach the brake pedal (and switch) to the brake booster than what is technically called for. It is tough to realize this when the spring steel clip flies off to who knows where. Of course I ordered the wrong clip trying to match the style that I saw buried up in the dash before it flew away. My truck now has the 'correct' clip, everyone can relax.I ordered some more brake fluid (DOT 3, nothing fancy) but it turns out I still have two fresh bottles (my shelves aren't empty, I just have too many shelves).Went to install my fancy new Optima YellowTop battery and it turns out I need a new side post terminal bolt. (Yet another order placed, bring on THE TARIFFS.) It would be a shame to strip out the threads on a nice new battery, no?Good news: The longer it takes me to get my truck started again, the more I save on fuel. 😁
  • Normie Weekends here would be a great time for everyone to join in praise of dog dish hubcaps on body-color matched steelies!
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