Hammer Time: To My Fellow Dealers

Steven Lang
by Steven Lang

You may have noticed that car dealers get bashed by the mainstream media on a regular basis.

There are a few good reasons for that.

We have what can be called an image problem. When folks think of a car dealer these days, they don’t think of a self-made man who started off with nothing but a love of cars and created a business that makes thousands of good folks happy.

What they think of is…

This…

And this…

And most definitely this.

Colorful crappy flags flying in the wind with neon green stickers on a car’s windshield that say “$500 DOWN! ONE OWNER! WHAT A DEAL!”

As a guy who has been remarketing used cars for about 16 years now, this phony baloney image has always pissed me off. Like a lot of guys who love cars and are lucky enough to make a living at it, I work my vital organs off to make sure that my business serves my customers and reflects my values.

Most of the successful dealers I know have spent years building their auto-related knowledge in this business. Trust me: It’s not easy at all.

Everything changes quick. Sometimes when a manufacturer has built a vehicle with quality issues, we get to be the guinea pigs hit with buying the new engine or transmission. This happens after the manufacturer is already aware of the problem and buries their legal head in the sand.

This type of shit always flows downhill when you’re a dealer. Guess who gets blamed for a Mazda CX-7 that has an engine design as defective as Andy Dick? The dealer who sells it — always. We get to find out from the customer six months later that the nice shiny car was really a rolling turd on the inside.

The manufacturer just gets to deny the claim.

There are countless other issues. Some of our members really are douchebags and they range from the guy hawking junk to the stupid and ignorant, to the dealers association who thinks that fighting Tesla serves anyone’s interest — including their own.

I have gone on record on a long list of media outlets, from Al Jazeera to Yahoo, telling our representatives to knock it off when it comes to Tesla. They have the right to sell their own product, and the manufacturers who are encouraging dealers to oppose Tesla (click and skip to 36:30 for the testimony from two GM attorneys) are essentially trying to operate as a legalized theft cartel.

There is also, unfortunately, a lot of PR hell you catch for operating a successful small business in a profession where the big guys get to stir the pot. When it comes time for someone, somewhere, to become the spokesmen for our business in a respectful manner, it’s rarely a working class guy like the one above. They’re too normal to fit that deformed mold of extreme tabloid spin.

It’s a shame because the successful in our business do more to help everyday folks, and the environment, by properly repairing and reconditioning millions of used vehicles.

We collectively achieve this. Every. Single. Year.

In the real world, you have to know more than just cars to become successful. In my case it was as an auto auctioneer, a remarketing manager, and much later operating an auto auction that sold thousands of cars. Some of us in the car business start out as body men, mechanics, or even enthusiasts like many of you who buy and sell one vehicle at a time.

We build businesses…and in the eyes of many, we’re the bad guys.

Do we get the publicity for our good works? Nope! Instead, we collectively wind up having our image hijacked by a variety of extremists and scum who couldn’t create a healthy image to save their asses from first base.

Don’t get me wrong. We do have a ton of good folks that get their moment in the sun. Go find a charity fundraising effort in any community and chances are you will find a dealer there along with plenty of other good-hearted business folks.

What I also find amazing is that some of our spokesmen are not actually dealers themselves. It’s like automotive journalists who don’t even own a car, or politicians who pretend to know everything from hemorrhoids to hurricanes. I frankly don’t blame any guy who asks for help and credits the guy who helped him figure it all out.

But that’s often the industry exception to what should be a golden rule.

Steven Lang
Steven Lang

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  • IronEagle IronEagle on Aug 21, 2015

    Oh l was laughing so hard l couldn't breathe from that second video. It hurt but thanks for the laugh!

  • DeWitt DeWitt on Aug 27, 2015

    What a bunch of cry-baby bs. Used car dealers right here in Georgia were able to get a new title tax law passed that has been a huge boon to car dealers. The idea that most used car dealers are self-made men just trying to build a business and serve the customer is a big load of crap. A lot of these dealers are trust-fund baby's playing with dad's money and otherwise unemployable.

  • Kwik_Shift_Pro4X What happened to using walnut shells? Too inconsistent?
  • Eddie One of my current vehicles is the longest I've ever owned one for, a 2007 Infiniti G35 sedan. I ordered it new in September 2006 and delivered to me in late October, so in a few weeks I'll have had it for 18 years. It started out being my weekend and road trip only car spending most of its life in the garage, but then gradually got pushed to daily driving duties as newer vehicles entered the stables. So far it has 186K miles on it and I have all intentions of keeping it until the engine or transmission gives out as either would be near the cost of what it is worth. I have always enjoyed that 306hp rear wheel drive V6 power and refuse to give it up!
  • Theflyersfan 1987 Nissan Stanza. Started as a new, inexpensive commuter car for my Dad. He got a company car a year later so it became my Mom's car. I turned 16 at the same time she injured her wrist and made it tough to drive a stick. I had it 6 years and put over 150,000 miles on it. Then it became my brother's car and then my sister's car at 16. At this point, it was over 250,000 miles and would not die. What killed the Super Stanza? Someone running a red light. We never thought a $12,000 car would make it as long as it did. It was still the original clutch! The paint was fading from sun and salt, small rust spots were visible, and the interior was tired, but it gave us hundreds of thousands of almost trouble-free miles.
  • SilverCoupe My dad kept the '64 Riviera from 1964 to 1996, so 32 years. I feel like it had 134,000 miles on it when sold, but I can't verify that.He kept our '70 Toronado until 1994, so 24 years. Can you believe it only had 30,000 miles on it when sold!My longest is my current car, an '08 Audi A5, purchased in 2011, so it is 16 years old, though I have only owned it for 13. It has about 55,000 miles on it. No issues so far.Prior to that, I kept my 2000 Audi TT for ten years, sold it with 82,000 miles. I sold it after a power steering failure (fluid leak).Before that, I kept my 1989 Toyota Supra Turbo for ten years, and sold it with 125,000 miles. An oil leak suggested head gasket issues to come.
  • Paul On my 9th VW. A 2003 Golf lasted 12 years, 82K. And yes succumbed to electrical issues not the drive train. Currently in a 2016 Golf at 52K. Unusually strong, no major or moderate issues. Fortunate to have an outstanding independent VW mechanic in my city.
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